Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
