at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
