I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize