Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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