Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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