Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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