Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
