Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I have already put on my inside pants.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
