Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
