Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Randomize
