i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
