"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
a search helicopter?!
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
