Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
