We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
