how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize