no, he came in my armpit
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
