Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(937): View more from Ohio

I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.

Fav 14 3396 1929
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(661): View more from California

I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him

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(940): View more from Texas

You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.

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(586): View more from Michigan

You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.

Fav 3 2006 1033
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(540): View more from Virginia

"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it

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(843): View more from South Carolina

Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...

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