Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
