I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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