3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
