You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
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