So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
MIDGETS
????
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
