Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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