They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
