Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize
