you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Randomize
