He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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