can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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