He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
