doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
We left an ass print on the piano.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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