Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
We are two peas in an std pod
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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