Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
