I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
