I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
honey bunches of taint.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize