If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
