We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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