I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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