Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
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