You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize