So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I have post one night stand depression
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
