I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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