Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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