I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
