Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
