I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
