I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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