can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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