I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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