Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
