But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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