"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
