i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
